Did everyone say you are different? Did they say there is something wrong with you?

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2064

 

From a young age, I was told that I was different, in fact, many of my “bad points” were actually good points for business and making money later on. It wasn’t until I started watching Gary Vee a few years ago that I knew being different is what it takes and I am relieved after all these years of trying not to be an introvert,  most successful people are introverts,  but that doesn’t mean avoiding people or not going to business meetings, it just means happy to be alone for long periods and getting worn out socialising.  (needing to be alone to recharge)

If you want to be in the top 1-5% wealthy, then you simply can’t be like everyone else, so for all the people out there that are ashamed of who they are because they don’t fit in, such as they don’t watch football, they are not popular and do not have excellent social skills, these people should be proud they are different and have more time.

Stubborn – I was told many times that I was stubborn, if I was told I couldn’t do something, I would try 5 times as hard to prove a point, I would always stick to my choice and try to push past the failures, but at the same time you can’t be stubborn just to win for ego reasons, you need to understand and believe that you can achieve it.  I held my ground many times on matters than most people would have walked away from, but this is why I started to have every business that I have.   Everyone told me not to start forums because the others were too big and we were the biggest very quickly, everyone told me not to buy a bar, then more bars,  and then not next door to each other,   there are lots of examples, but I worked it out in my head first, then went for it, failure wasn’t an option.  Some of the bars didn’t make money and some investors asked me to retreat,  I ignored them and continued to push and sure enough, we did it.

Introvert – When I was younger I was always looking at ways of being more popular, but whilst it’s good to improve our communication skills and likability, if we simply don’t want to be around people all the time, you are fighting a losing battle. You can’t try to attract more friends then be unavailable or not meet up. Being happy to be alone is a great skill to have because you can stay at home and work your ass off.   Most of the wealthiest people are introverts, simply because they don’t “hang out” and waste time that they could be used to add value to their business.  

Obsessed – I was always told I got obsessed on things that I was doing, I am even like that now if I am trying to learn something, I get very full-on, I am either full on or nothing, which is a big problem for me, so I tend to cycle. I am always trying to balance this but I have given up fighting it, providing I cycle between the same goals, skills that I am learning, I am happy.  I would obsess over the websites I am creating or become obsessed with buying more bars, it’s not always a good thing, so I try and jump to another thing by changing all the time what I am learning or practising. 

Bouncing from one thing to another  –  I was always ridiculed for going from one idea to the other, but looking back, this has given me so many skills, so I wouldn’t fight it, but it’s important they are related.  For example, I have learnt SEO, internet marketing, business, making websites, psychology and investments.  They are all related and can be used together.  I wouldn’t suggest jumping from learning about growing plants to then learning about yoga and then back to something else.  We need to master something to be wealthy but if they all fit together then its a great thing. I am happy I continued being me,  I would have felt suppressed and stressed anyway just doing one thing. 

Taking Risks – I have always taken risks, but this is the only way to grow quickly especially when you have nothing,  I have took a lot of risks growing our bar business so far, really stretching our accounts and borrowing money.  I have taken risks investing in stocks, crypto and other business ideas.  But as you make more money you need to start taking fewer risks and protecting your assets.  So you need to take smart risks, just be aware of self-sabotaging risks.

Independence – Part of being an introvert, wanting to travel and being a lone wolf, this has enabled me to travel alone to Thailand and move here with no friends or family here at the age of 25.  I had no income but believed in myself, I was obsessed with the Pattaya addicts forum that I had created, I knew I would find a way of making money with it.  I always looked forward to staying at friends/relatives houses and did my best to be away from home and I moved out when I was 17.

Thinking out the box –  I have always thought out of the box, it’s one of my best attributes, if you tell me something is impossible, I will still look for a way to do it, I am very good at finding solutions, sometimes they shock people,  putting boundaries and egos aside.  “why not” is a very good question to ask immediately when people say they have tried some things and they didn’t work. Sometimes it’s worth the effort of doing something that it doesn’t seem to be.

Spectator Sports – Every time I was asked what football team I supported, I was looked at weird when I said I don’t watch football or follow a team, you could even say socially outcasted because you don’t have that in common and you are unable to talk about it or share celebrations. I have never followed or been one of the sheep, I have never felt it was what I wanted to do, I prefer to lead other people into success and use my time building my own things.  It did make me feel shy in social situations when you have a group of lads wondering why you don’t support football or have any idea…  but I had a good excuse, my home town is Coventry and they aren’t a good team, so I would joke that’s why I wouldn’t follow football, because I don’t want to be disappointed time and time again. Now I am older, I would rather say that I want to make money and add value, rather than watching someone run around a field.

Being Quiet – Being quiet is very good for leadership and listening, being the last to talk is a good skill and saying quality stuff that everyone pays attention to, if you refer to someone as quiet, they almost take it as an insult, but I think its an amazing skill to have, some guys I know really struggle to listen to those around them, and for that reason they don’t learn much and they are unable to really guide and help their staff.  Coaching people is about listening and guiding them to fix their own issues.